Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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