how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize