Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
