the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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