Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
