I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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