Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
