when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize