Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
