My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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