Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize