**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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