i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Randomize
