More tranny stories later!
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
