if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
