so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Randomize
