I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
