Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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