What a fucking waste of an outfit
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
