TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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