We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
