Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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