that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Randomize
