I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
