nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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