just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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