could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?