Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
