I bet he comes in French.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize