I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
birth control should be required to get into college
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Randomize
