You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
