Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
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