i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
