I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
i out mim tonsoeep
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