i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
