If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
