Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I currently don't understand fingers.
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