it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
