Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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