He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
