i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Randomize
