Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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