Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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