This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
