this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
