Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
