WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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