Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
