I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Randomize
