Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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