I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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