i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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