didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize